Best Dinner Ever *Post 1 of 4*

Steak Fingers: w/ Marinara sauce

This dinner was so yummy i loved it and now you have to try it, if you want the recipe let me know, it is kind of fatty, but so yummy, if you serve it with instant loaded mash potatoes and salad its perfect. :D

Home Improvement B4 & Afters *2 of 4*

Remember when i said i would post pictures of the improvements well here they are.....

I am so happy wth the way things have turned out, there is still more to come and more decorating, but somone told me that making the perfect house is not going to happen in one day it is bringing thing to the table over the years.

working on my bald long wall still, i will have something up i have an idea what im going to do, just have not yet gotten to it.

down stairs bathroom, looks somewhat better its not my favrtiest bathroom, but looks better then white. :D

now this bathroom i love. :D upstairs bath its done nicly. :D

5 yrs ago & 9 months *3 of 4*

(Note: some of these dates maybe off it was a crazy year that Year.)

Around this time i found out i was pregnant. This was a very scary day, because of the situation i was hoping that it wouldn't happen.
My mom was out of town with my siblings and i was in the bathroom doing my business and all of the sudden i get this feeling, i don't know how to describe it, but it was like an electric zap that had electrocuted my whole body and it was almost like a voice had told me your pregnant, i called my mom while in the bathroom and explained to her what happened and that i needed to get a pregnancy test STAT!!! BAD idea my mom was in the in Idaho and i really should have just waited to call her but i was in so much shock didn't think, and man i didn't know someone could drive so fast, between all of this i finally got the courage to call me aunt and tell her what was going on, she came to the house picked me up took me to the store bought me a pregnancy test and took me to her house......................

At this time i ran down stairs where i hoped no one would be so i could go in the bathroom and do my thing, well my cousin was down there, so i ran in the bathroom before she could say anything to me, and i peed O-M-G did this pee seem like forever it was like watching a slow motion video, before i could even get the cap on the test it had already began changing and it was so fast i had never seen something change so fast when i saw the - then the + My hand trembled it was like i had no control over my body i fell to my knees and screamed so loud and started crying bloody murder and i remember every part of this i said abortion over and over again My cousin comes running in she had no clue what was going on, and when she saw it she just held me close and tried to comfort me, but comfort was not helping me at all.

When i got up stairs my mom was there, and so was everyone else, everyone was crying, and in tears, i think everybody was in shock, my uncle called the police so they were there, and it was so much to take in at once.

Then my mom took me to the emergency room, and how embarrassing is that to tell someone i was raped and then have to be BLAH this whole thing is just crazy everything you have to go through for that and the questions and detail and its just emotional, almost wish i had just kept everything to myself.

I'm glad i didn't, i went back to church with my mom, aunt and uncle, and it was the first Sunday of the month February i remember cause i hated the first Sunday of the month (testimony days) YUK. anyway i just had this feeling that i needed to talk get something off my chest so i did i got up there and said what i needed to say, and when church was over my bishop came up to me and asked what i was going to do?

I told him i didn't know, he told me if i needed anything that his door was wide open for me to come talk, and he handed me this card that read * LDS family services* He said I'm not telling you have to, but if it is something you would consider you should give them a call.

I took it shook hands and went home, the next day Monday i called LDS family services they set an appointment for me to come in i went in and met my caseworker and she asked me questions and the whole shabang and gave me a few profiles to look at i think there as five or 6 of them in there. I explained to her that if i considered this that i wanted open adoption, and she said i think you will like the selection that i have given you then, so i took them home and Mom and I looked at them. We looked at the first one and right off we said NO! just didn't get a spark but as i was flipping to the second profile this family stuck out at me * goosebumps* :D it was like i didn't even have to read their profile it was just like in the bathroom a major shock and a voice that said pick them.

So i called up my case worker and told her about the family that had caught my attention so she had me bring in the other profiles and told me to keep that one and think about it, i took it home and immediately i just knew it was them again, i told her i don't need to think about it this is it. I know it is.

So i wrote a letter to the family end of February, well i did more then write a letter, i did kinda of a birthday card look and on the inside i glued some ultrasound pictures in there and in writing i wrote ITS A GIRL. took it to the caseworker and she sent it out to the families caseworker and well i have the letter the family wrote to me saying everything that went through there mind, and if she says its okay i will post it on another blog another day i still read it to this day i get teary eyed and start sobbing, but who would of thought how much of a strong feeling you could get for someone when you don't even know them all you have is a picture of the family a letter the family wrote talking about them and profile.

It was March when i heard back from them, i told them Hallie's, due date was in July i guess their daughter was really excited to hear that because Her birthday was in July as well, so i couldn't have been more happy for her as well, but as time went on the pregnancy got a little difficult i was put on bed rest and i had all day sickness through the whole 9 months and it was kind of miserable, but my mom gave me her scope so i could hear the babies heart beat and that was the best part of the whole thing being able to talk to her and tell her about her new family an read to her the letters they wrote, and listen to her moves inside my tummy, before i new it June had come around.

Sunday June 19Th The family was over at my aunts for Sunday dinner, and i was not feeling right, my back was hurting, i was in some pain, and finally my aunt and cousin timed the contractions and rubbed my feet *oh that felt so good* and when they were 3 min apart it was time to go into the women's center and find out was going on.

It was 6 pm when we went in i SWORE i was in the room for a few hours in so much pain the contractions were getting worse and they wouldn't give me anything till the nurse came in to check my cervix and gees that felt like forever, but sure enough she comes in and checks and said YEP you were right your going into labor I'm thinking to myself well obviously DUH anyway i cant remember when my water broke exactly, but i do know i was in there from Sunday 6 pm till 12:30 pm Monday afternoon and finally she was ready to come, 1pm Monday afternoon there was Hallie. :) 7lbs 1oz 20in. My mom says she wil never forget that day because When she was having me * she went in Sunday afternoon and had me monday at 1 in the afternoon as well. i thought that was pretty neat*

Now Hallie is 5 years old, cute as ever has 2 sisters and 1 brother, a good mom and dad and very big family. I love Her and everyone who surrounds her with love and happyness. :D

Splish Splash *4 of 4*

This summer we planned a vacation to Oregon, this was a very needed vacation, it was so nice to get out of the city for awhile and go to a BEACH!!!! i have not been to the beach in years maybe 6-7 years.

My Grandma and Older Sister leave in Oregon, it was so nice to see them agian, sorry guys i have no pictures of them, Grandma didnt want her picture taken, and we were having so much fun with my sister i totally forgot my camera. Minus my gut *which is smaller now thanks to a DIET*

The beach was so fun, and suprisingly it was nice and not that cold.
How gross is that i can't believe he touched it,
but i will add it looks kinda cool, there were tonz of those,
WELL DEAD ONES


SEA SHELLS no ITS A CRAB<>My handsome hubby, i love him so. :D

Look at that tall handsome dude,

This beach was lots of fun.

and dont forget the sunsets. HUM!! i could stare at this for days.

Is That Really You

Who's that? Do i know him? NO WAY that cant be him he looks old has grey hair, when i saw my dad last he was skinny, looked taller and had brown hair, there is no way this is my Dad.........

Yep it has been 7 years since i have seen him, and man has it been long time i mean i really shouldn't count the 7 years cause when he came down from Missouri i was heading out the door to go on a date with this guy named Jason he was totally more important than my dad. So we Will say i have not seen my dad since i was 12 years old and even then that's a really long time. He has come in and out of my life so often i really don't know the man anymore, if you know me and my family you should know how it all went down, and well how much contact we had with him NONE and then out of the blue my siblings and I get a call I'm moving to Utah, WHAT!! am i hearing this right? I think so..... Can you say that again? Are you lying to us again? No I'm moving to Utah. WOW i did hear this right. I will be close to the end of September so is there a place for me to stay for awhile???? **** in my mind, well he could sleep in the dog hose he kind of belongs there, but then he is family so i couldn't do that to him, he is trying to make up for the whole 11 12 years that he has been gone, it would be weird to have him stay with my mom she would feel so weird, my brother is gone, and my sister is living with my mom so I'm the only one with a house GEES I do have a spare bedroom.........**** yea dad sorry you got me by surprise i have a room hear you can stay in. Oh okay and your hubby will be okay with this..... He will manage Laura i mean dad. Well see ya when you get here. Bye.

2 weeks later and walla he is here, doesn't seem to have changed much i guess his pictures just look old, he is shorter although i have grown 2 feet since i last saw him. All i have to say is having him here is weird and will take some time to get used to, but it was really nice to see him again, we talked over the last few days about why he left and how he left was really cowardly but I'm glad he told me he was sorry and selfish for leaving.

If you could only see how much he has missed, my wedding, graduations births, birthdays that's a lot ya know, but he is here now and i guess all i can do is just give him a chance and hope he doesn't leave us again. :)

Cabin!!!

The middle of September My hubby, son and I went up to the cabin for the weekend with my Sister in-law Lindsay This time up she asked if we wanted to do pictures cause the leaves are changing up that way SO of course how could i turn down pictures i LOVE PICTURES Chris maybe not so much, but he can deal. :) so we took some pictures Lindsay took pictures with my camera and visversa. We had tons of fun and cant wait to go back there again. Here are some of the pictures. Enjoy thanks Lindsay for taking a pictures.

Guess What? Guess What? Guess What?

I have a computer now and guess what else INTERNET TOO!!!!!! YAY now i can keep up with everyone and blog about it. :D I am so excited. SO here is my official blog from my new computer in my very own house. WAHOOO going to post more in a different post. Thanks for being so patient.

Its almost Over, but more to come

The summer is coming to an end and man oh man has it gone by fast. I'm ready for the weather to change, but I'm not sure I'm ready for winter!. I mean who is right?

I have started this NEW HOT diet that i have been hearing so much about, it is hard at first, but so worth is i have lost 8 lbs now most of it lost in my boobs but it is something right I'm hoping to lose more, as long as i stick to the diet i think i could get to 145lbs which would be FREAKIN AMAZING.

My little boy is in 1st grade now, i can't believe how big he is getting. He is getting very independent and I'm sad cause this means he is going to need me less and less each day. Today he asked if he could walk home from school by himself :( or course i timed are walks and found the safest route and today he did, he did it all by himself, I'm so proud of him. He is such a good kid *sometimes*

I have a wonderful neighbor who is a photographer and i love taking pictures and want to become one myself one day, she invited me to help her with a wedding and of course i excepted the invite and it was wonderful my first photography shoot for a wedding, i am so happy and i was so excited to be doing something that i love so much. I hope she asks me to help her more, she has given me so many ideas and things i should work on to make my pictures better. :)

I have been trying to have more of a positive out look on things and it is getting better since i have excepted the fact that no matter what CRAP is going to happen whether i like it or not, and sometimes I'm going to be in denial, sure everyone is at one point or another, but when something comes along *like bills* i wished i never had i just put the ones i cant make right now and ones that can wait on the back burner tell i can make the payment on them. If its late oh well as long as the company gets their money I'm sure they could care less.

Hope everyone had a GREAT SUMMER!!!!!!

bleepity bloppity BOO

I cant think of a single thing to blog about....... AND IT SUCKS because this means i have just been a bump on a log doing nothing being lazy JORDANN. It seems like it has been so busy, but really it has not been all that busy, do a few things here and there and WALLAH I'm done. I think i have taken 3 PG tests in the past week and all which have said NEGATIVE, but still have this feeling i am, but don't want to make the doctors appointment and waist someones time to tell me that I'm not. SOO maybe i should wait a little longer.

ThE aGeNdA

So we have are walls painted and they look wonderful, we have are new furniture man oh man does it look nice. i love it. now this place is really starting to look like and feel like a home. I still have a few touch ups here and there that i need to do. I have an idea of what i am going to do with my very long wall hopefully soon i will get started on that. Kayden is in Karate, Chris is still working hard as ever. And well i have just been bumming around the house and trying to get things touched up. This summer has been kinda BLAH but i think it should start looking up soon. This Friday i get to take Hallie out for her 5Th birthday i am really excited, and cant wait to see her, after wards Chris's dad is having a fathers day camping trip thing so we are going to that Friday night Saturday day. If you know Chris's Dad he is a little weird, but what family isn't right???? We have been wanting to go Camping anyway so this is a good time to go out and well spend fathers day.

Happy Day.

Ever have one of those days when you wake up and its going to be a good day well that's what it is, i woke up for the first time in along time HAPPY. I mean there are days when i was happy, but not just HAPPY HAPPY i don't know what it is about today. but it is happy, so I'm calling this my Happy day!

My Birthday is coming up in 20 days i cant believe that a whole year has gone, then Hallie's birthday, and then Mine and Chris's 2ND year Anniversary in August. :D WOW we made it two years married, and 4 1/2 years together its amazing. I cant wait to spend more years with this awesome. Guy.

I almost lost Chris a week & 1/2 or so ago give or take a few days, had a huge lump *is what i will call it* that was letting blood flow in , but not out which caused a blood clot which was causing GANGRENE which was about to go into his blood stream which almost caused him to leave me forever.............. If we had not taken him to the ER which lead him to the specialist who said YOU NEED SURGERY NOW!!!! I would go crazy if i had lost him, not only would i have lost Chris, but i would lose Kayden as well, and i would have been all alone. I cant imagine being alone, yes there is family, but to lose your SOUL mate your partner the one you said i love you to every day & just up and leave & never get to see or say those words to again. That would be heart ache just thinking about it makes me not want to get old and die.

Chris's & Mines family was very supportive in this & I'm so grateful for family, without them there would be no purpose in living.

I miss my sister since she left for Missouri, I wish she was home, but i know she needed to get out and figure things out for her self. She is doing pretty good for a 19 year old don't ya think?

My brother has become a POSER i think that's right, came up to me asked me to take pictures for him and make a calendar for him OKAY WEIRDO All though i do say so myself i think they turned out pretty good.

Is it EVER going to be Spring

I woke up to this, in the morning thinking OMGosh it is April 13Th & there is

SNOW

Are back yard is a work in progress, but i love it cause it is so BIG. :D

NEW TABLE #2

Isn't it a Really nice table.
Kayden's Grandma & Grandpa are the bomb DIGITY. Julie saw a sale at shopko on tables and wanted to know which one we liked i told her i liked the espresso color so much better then the lighter colored wood, and a day later looks what they got us. I was so happy to have a table in my home, & not only that but we are not eating at the coffee table anymore. I'm so thankful for them we have been in such a rut with things that this made are day. Thanks :D

OH MY GOSH #3

This is my ugly livingRoom/Dining room. With my ugly couches that are falling apart they were nice in the begning, but now i hate them, and i hope we can better couches soon cause the paints i have picked out will not match the furniture. HUM!!! OVER ALL im still living my house thouh to be able to just do whatever i want in it its FREAKIN awesome. :D

Painting. :D

Since now We finally have a table things kinda just came together and we have colors picked out now for are home, but of course i want some approvals to see if some people like the colors i have picked out. Thus saying Lindsey get your butt over here. :P. HA HA i think Friday the 17Th sounds good don't you???? I'm really excited painting is the very beginning of everything isn't it before decorating? right? if I'm wrong please tell me.
I'm trying to find paint samples so i can post them on here, but i cant. I will keep looking and post something next time, if anything you will just have to wait tell the painting is finished. :D

I cant believe it is already April this year is going by so fast, and it is snowing in dang state still isn't it supposed to be Spring by now? My Birthday is around the corner I'm not old old, but feeling REALLY old.
Easter was okay we didn't have Kayden this Easter so i was a little bummed. We spent Easter with my family this year the kids had a Easter scavenger hunt it was a lot of fun to see the kids running around looking for clues. This was the first time we did something like this for Easter and i would so do it again. How was every ones Easter.?

Having spent time with my family for the first time for Easter in along time it really makes me miss it, i have spent so many holidays with Chris's family that i have neglected mine, i really need to work out the holidays so we spent time with both families equally.

Well tell next time.

P.S. next time could be in a week or two just depends.

Im STILL ALIVE

It has been a crazy few months let me tell you this. I didn't realize how much my life would change, just by moving into are own home. :D, but it is great and I'm really loving it. So I'm sorry to all my readers i didn't leave you and should be back soon.
A couple of days ago My sons, Grandparents bought us a really nice table. I'm so glad that we have them in are lives, we are very blessed to have such good people who have stood by us through everything. Kayden starts Basketball in April he is really excited although I'm kinda worried cause all he has been doing is baseball so i guess we will See how well he does. I really would like to see him in baseball but I'm not going to force him to do something he doesn't want to. Chris has been working two jobs it has been kinda hard, just two more weeks of this second job and he is done and we will be doing pretty good. I'm really happy Chris has been doing good, i worry about him sometimes, but he seems to be coming around and getting into the groove of things. :P well i will post pictures soon of the improvements to are home. I hope to hear from you all soon. Love

Jordann.